It is probably a strange thing to see a welcome/introductory blog when it is actually the 9th blog I have created in recent months but I figured that while I am still finding my footing and writing style, I would step away from what I have been writing about and instead talk a little bit about why I am writing these things.
I have been attempting to start/continue a blog for a very long time and I have always struggled with the motivation and willpower to sit down and focus on the task at hand. Couple this with my low confidence and self esteem; in myself and my writing and the fact I don’t like the quality of what I write or don’t believe they will be received well as well as my often ‘lethargic’ nature of late and you don’t get the perfect cocktail for productivity. As it stands, I am being more consistent than before but I need to become more regular in terms of days posting and varied in the content I put out. That is my evaluation of what I have done and how I have performed so far.
As to why I have been writing, it has been a long time coming but it has been something I have always wanted to do. I love talking about the topics I talk about and I really want to engage people on these discussions to see what everyone else thinks. Last year I was fortunate enough to start a job that allowed me to work within the video game industry on the marketing of the games I love meaning I got to have these discussions with like minded people. I had worked so hard to get into the video games industry that it was very disappointing this year when I was made redundant due to the impact of Coronavirus. After years of trying to find a way into this industry, I was now on the outside again and that was very demoralising. You combine this with the fact that I have been in and out of therapy for the last two or so years for low moods, depression and anxiety it made the reality of it all a very hard pill to swallow. Now, I want to stress that my situation is in no way the worst case; I am fortunate to have my health, my family and a level of stability still so when I talk about this all I don’t mean to sound ungrateful for what I have, only as context to why I am doing what I am doing. I for sure had dark days, but on the days that I could muster the focus, I kept coming back to the idea of a blog. Here, I can talk about what I would like to talk about and engage, in my own way, with the industry I would still like to be a part of.
A bit more on me, I graduated from Warwick with a degree in Ancient History and I have since worked around in roles ranging from customer service and supply chain to commercial and some marketing. The 2020 situation has left the job world in a bit of limbo with high unemployment and minimal opportunities, so the temptation to fall into the habits of playing video games and watching Netflix is incredibly strong. But the blog gives me an opportunity to enforce a level of routine and willpower than puts a check on my ‘unproductive’ temptations. I have picked up part time work as well (although one role has been furloughed) to stem the leaking boat that is my bank account, but all in all, the blog is my leash. It keeps me on track while I wait for opportunities to open again. And maybe, this blog will contribute towards that next role, maybe it WILL be the next role – I don’t know. But in the meantime, I am working on starting and building a community here.
Looking over what I have written so far as well, I will move away from Pokémon as well I promise. I love the franchise but I need to practice writing about other topics as well. So expect to see other game talk, films and TV as well as the odd other discussion points. Of course anything in particular you guys would like to read, please hit me up on Twitter or drop me a comment here and I will sit down and give it ago. You can also check out my other blog that I set up and run alongside my friend’s podcast, TripleXP. All of this will hopefully tighten up my writing style and increase my confidence, but please don’t hesitate to let me know how I am doing and give me prompts and tips. All feedback is good (although please don’t test that too much!) and will contribute to the growth of this blog and keep me accountable.
Until next time, keep safe out there and keep your chin up. Its tough at the moment and I don’t think any of us were ready for 2020. Best thing we can do is to lean on each other (figuratively, don’t want to breach that social distancing) and get through it together.